A session held in November at Holy Trinity Church in Dayton, Ohio gave parishioners an opportunity to open their hearts and speak their truth about the clergy sexual abuse crisis in the Church. “Four Courageous Conversations,” was an evening listening session that “brought people together in a safe space,” said Fr. Angelo Anthony, the pastor of Holy Trinity and two other parishes in Dayton. 

“The object of the session, which was open to the deanery, was to give each person the opportunity to share what’s on their heart and mind” about the crisis, he said. “The process was a lot like the listening circles held at the Precious Blood Ministry of Reconciliation in Chicago.”

Organized with the help of a Catholic consulting firm, the evening consisted of four questions that were posed to the 25 people who attended. The participants were put into small groups or circles; each circle had a facilitator and a scribe so that what was said in the circle could be shared with the larger group and Church leadership. 

Many feelings came out at the session, which was facilitated by a lay person with ministerial training. Having a trained facilitator serves a number of purposes: it frees the pastor to participate, but he did not have to mediate or inform. The facilitator could also help defuse the potential volatility of this topic. 

At the session, participants expressed anger, frustration, and a feeling that they’d been abandoned by their Church. “We heard people say, ‘I’m conflicted about the Church, and I don’t know if I want to stay,’” Fr. Anthony said. “Many people said the Church needs to be more transparent. Others said, ‘We know people are leaving the Church over this—this is serious and the Church needs to formulate a coherent response.’”

Faith, hope and commitment were also expressed at the session, he added. “People said, ‘I’m not leaving the Church.’ ‘I love the Church.’ ‘The sacraments are important to me,’” he said. “They said that they want the Church to move away from secrecy, to bring things out into the open, even though it’s going to be painful.” They also spoke of their compassion for victims of clergy sexual abuse.

 “There was the sense that the Church has weathered lots of storms, and we’re in a storm right now—but we can still be grateful. Grateful that we’re not alone. Grateful to hear people’s love for their Church,” Fr. Anthony said. “The Church is to be a place where we can bring our lives and the brokenness of our world, to try to enable our faith to lead and guide us through the difficult times, to know that as a Church we are a community, not just isolated individuals. The Church has to provide opportunities for people who are hurting to have a place to share their burdens and know they’re not alone in what they’re feeling.”

Story by Jean Giesige, Communication Director- Cincinnati Province